Warning: array_merge(): Argument #2 is not an array in /home/perfecto/perfectworldtoo.us/public_html/preflight/indexFunctions.php on line 3673
Funny Things Kids Do and Say
Folders: A Sense of Place ·­ Blogosphere ·­ Chat ·­ Competitive Sports ·­ Current Events ·­ Domestic Sphere ·­ Family ·­ Finance, Careers, & Education ·­ Games & Goofiness ·­ Geek Subjects ·­ Global Policy ·­ Health & Fitness ·­ Literature & The Arts ·­ Marketplace ·­ Meta-Forum ·­ Mostly Christmas ·­ Movies ·­ Politics ·­ Social Policy ·­ TPW Archives ·­ TV Talk ·­ Values & Beliefs
 
The Perfect World >> Family >> Funny Things Kids Do and Say

Funny Things Kids Do and Say

Alice CK -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 08:56:38 AM

Share your stories here!

This thread is tagged: children, humor
tag this thread:   
  (All users will see what tags exist for a thread. Please tag carefully!)
Check Subscriptions   The Latest   First   Previous   Next   Recent   
Alice CK -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:02:20 AM -- 1 of 13862
the glass in the toilet is quite a pretty blue

I overheard Woodstock singing "The Twelve Days of Christmas" with the line "Eleven Swipers swiping." I think she's been watching too much Dora the Explorer.

That song is a favorite in our house. Snoopy's teacher tells me that Snoopy, having finished her paperwork early last Monday, requested to stand in front of the class and entertain them with a rendition of that song. Well, as anyone could have told her would happen, she got bogged down somewhere after "five golden rings" and couldn't remember the verses. So she calls out, "Would anyone out there like to come up and help me with the rest of this song?"

Apparently about nine kids all rushed up to stand beside her and sing with her. Of course, none of them knew the words either, so it didn't help much except to take the heat off of Snoopy, of whom I am prodigiously proud for her quick thinking and self-possession in getting out of an awkward situation.

lime -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:04:19 AM -- 2 of 13862
you can fight it, or you can rock out to it

We were eating lunch on Saturday, when Katrina asked me what radiant meant. I was having a little trouble explaining it to her, but I told her it meant glowing. She still looked confused, and I asked her where she'd heard it.

She told me that they had been doing name poems in class, where you pick a descriptive word for each letter of the name, and the teacher was doing an example for Mrs. R. Radiant was the word she chose for the R.

K. explains all of this to me, then she looks at me and says, "But Mrs. R. isn't glowing."

lime -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:04:47 AM -- 3 of 13862
you can fight it, or you can rock out to it

Oh, that is very cute, Alice!

Alice CK -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:07:43 AM -- 4 of 13862
the glass in the toilet is quite a pretty blue

Perhaps Mrs. R. is internally radiant. Of course, I'm envisioning something like what Marie Curie saw when she went to the lab in the middle of the night.

Lime, we all laughed our heads off around here at Snoopy's phraseology. "Hey everyone out there in kindergarten land, come on down and sing!"

Arlene Green -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:12:21 AM -- 5 of 13862
Moulton inspires metanoia.

Kids are nuts.

R., the 7 year old that we are taking care of, walked up to me last night and said for no particular reason, "I can open my chest."

"Oh?"

"See?" (insert elaborate pantomime of child opening his chest here)

"That's cool. Why do you need to open your chest?"

"Because I have salt and pepper right here next to my heart."

Then he grinned at me and walked away.

ema nymtonsti -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 06:15:17 AM -- 6 of 13862

There's a Wiggles song with the line "bow to your partner" which my three year old thinks is "growl to your partner", and he says "grrr grrr grrr" to whoever is with him when the song is playing.

Lori Dee -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 07:23:38 AM -- 7 of 13862
Axial tilt is the reason for the season.

Cute stuff. Salt and pepper next to his heart? Seasoned professional charmer, pun intended.

One of the most funny things that my oldest son said happened as such: I would tell him in kindergarten to try to color in the lines as his teacher was requesting he try harder. He would always get very frustrated. Finally, in first grade, it came up again and he shouted "there ARE NO LIONS, there ARE NO LIONS!!!".

Arlene Green -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 07:42:48 AM -- 8 of 13862
Moulton inspires metanoia.

Ha!

I can relate to the kid. You keep telling him to color in the 'lions' and for a year he is thinking these people are on crack. There are no lions on this page!"

I run headfirst into that kind of cognitive dissonance all the time in the tech world. People spout words without bothering to find out if their definition is the same as mine. Or if they are even using the same word. Homophones can be a bitch when you are 6 or when you are a geek.

Brigit M -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 12:43:19 PM -- 9 of 13862

When Spudboy, aka Kevin, was about eight I was listening to Lost 80's Lunch Hour on the local radio station, singing tunelessly along with Belinda Carlisle. Having wandered into the kitchen for a drink, he stopped, stood listening intently, and smiled as if he'd just had an enormous stroke of luck. "Mommy," he asked, "what is this song singing?" I repeated the line that had just played. "No," he said, "the part with earth." "Oh, 'Heaven Is a Place on Earth.' That's the name of the song."

His face fell. "Ohhh," he said, and turned to walk away.

"What did you think it was saying?" I asked.

"I thought it said 'Kevin has a place on earth.' "

J-Ro -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 01:45:20 PM -- 10 of 13862
It will all be OK in the end. If it isn't OK, it isn't the end.

Little has been going to the bathroom an awful lot. We had to pause our movie yet again the other night while she got up and went. Everyone scowled. "Well," she cried, "I have an attractive bladder! I mean an interactive bladder! Oh, you know what I mean!"

Janey Garnet -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 02:05:14 PM -- 11 of 13862

We have the talking Galileo ornament on our tree, and Dexter loves it. He recites its little monolouge as "Shuttlecraft to Enterprise. Shuttlecraft to Enterprise. Tock here. Happy howidays. Be raw and crossper."

Brigit M -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 02:14:48 PM -- 12 of 13862

Be raw and crossper.

I think we have another TPW T-shirt here!

Cathy Georges -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 02:52:35 PM -- 13 of 13862
so, if im that much yr elder u shld have more respect 4 me

"I have an attractive bladder! I mean an interactive bladder! Oh, you know what I mean!"

I'm sooo tempted to change my tagline again.

momma_tiger -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 03:01:18 PM -- 14 of 13862

My son used to call the Home Depot, the Home Hippo. The name's stuck.

Alice CK -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 03:04:16 PM -- 15 of 13862
the glass in the toilet is quite a pretty blue

Now I'm cudgeling my brain to remember what "Be raw" is a mangling of.

Janey Garnet -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 03:06:46 PM -- 16 of 13862

Live long and prosper.

Alice CK -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 03:10:30 PM -- 17 of 13862
the glass in the toilet is quite a pretty blue

Thanks!

betsifur -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:02:26 PM -- 18 of 13862

See my tagline, for Ellie's version of a line from Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer.

Yesterday, my 6 year old started chanting "The roach, the roach, the roach is in the hall. We don't need no rug, just let the roach crawl." Unfortunately, there really was a roach in the hall, but at least it was dead.

(Deleted message originally posted by Emily on Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 04:58:13 PM.)

StephanieD -- Friday, December 20, 2002 -- 05:34:45 PM -- 20 of 13862

When my sister was five, she asked my parents "Do you want to see an ignorant curtsey?"

Sure, they said.

So she turned around, facing away from them, and curtseyed deeply, meanwhile lifting her skirt all the way up in the back to show off her undies.

Check Subscriptions   The Latest   First   Previous   Next   Recent   
Subscribe  
The Perfect World >> Family >> Funny Things Kids Do and Say